And so it begins

I have been really feeling the need to talk through my struggles lately. I have difficulty doing this in my real life. I'm not dying and while this affliction robs me of so many things I know that I am so blessed compared to the health struggles that many have. So I decided to make this a place where I can come as some faceless and nameless person in cyberspace, where I cannot be judged by the looky- loos that know me irl (when you've been labeled a hypochondriac by crazies who think they know you it's hard to be honest and real about how you feel) or feel like I'm burdening those that know me in cyberspace with my whining.

I've been battling this officially (that means doctor diagnosis) for about a year but when I look back at things I can see this has been a part of my life for so much longer. I am blessed that I finally found a doctor who listened to me and is open to me trying other ways of managing this than painkillers, antidepressants and drugs. (I know that those things work wonders for many but I personally need to exhaust all other options before I can consider going back on anti-depressants (which nearly killed me). My tolerance for pain meds is very low and a mother of 4 has a hard time being an incoherent zombie). I'll share more about my treatment later.